I’ve been a busy little bee, the PHD is on the back burner while I work on my novel (feels a little weird to write that and even say it). The problem with the PHD is as always money, there doesn’t seem to be any for the subject that I want to do, so I’m focusing on this, until I can find what I need for that.

I haven’t been able to write for so many years, not properly, yes I’ve done a BA and an MA and was able to write academically, but fiction writing, my first true love since I learnt to write, I wasn’t able to do, maybe it was the meds I was on when I was in hospital, maybe it was the fear of ending up in hospital again that closed off that part of my mind, I don’t know, but now it’s back, now I feel the yearning again, the passion to complete this.

Another reason to do this is that I’m not getting any younger, I’m 40+, and I want to enjoy seeing my work in print or E-book, I wrote it, and I want to get it out there now, I was always so worried about it failing, confidence was always a killer in my life, but I got to thinking, why let someone else print my work when I go, or worse, shred it and dump it when I spent all those years, months, days creating characters, situations and worlds for them to inhabit, no, it’s time.

Of course as my passion is back and I want to deliver something that is at least readable, everything else creative that I was doing has slipped to one side, it won’t be long now I promise, I’ll get back to them, for now I want to concentrate on this, I want to nurture this pride I feel in my own work, and kill the nay saying demon in my head that still tells me that it’s all pointless…

so, back to work, and yey go me 

(I’m my own personal cheering section lol).

laters gators, live, love, laugh, dance, sing, and be the best you you can be…